Because I don't like to talk about it much, I don't think I have mentioned on here that my brother will be deploying next year. I found out right before Grant was born. In fact, he is suppose to step foot on Iraq's ground on Grant's first birthday. :*( He is going through what is called the "road to war" right now with his training, and he is suppose to go to Africa for three weeks this summer. They've already sent this huge box thing home with him (it's bigger than most deep freezers) that he's suppose to pack his belongings in. That makes it real to me. That and this new show on Lifetime called "Coming Home." We watched it Sunday night after Army Wives, and I sobbed the entire time. Then, Monday morning a fried shared a link on facebook about it. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I cried harder than I have in a long time. (Blame it on the hormones from being less than two months away from childbirth if you will.) I went to Wayne, put my face in his sweet shoulder, and cried. And cried. I couldn't help but think about just how long a year is. And how much my precious boys who love their Bubba so much will change while he's gone. And how badly I will miss him. And all the birthdays he will miss. My family will get together for 8 birthdays while he's gone. There will be a noticeable empty chair. And holidays. Like Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter. I just can't stand the thought of it. Not to mention the fact that I will be scared. to. death. while he is gone. The only thing that is helping me manage dealing with this is the fact that he is an Air Traffic Controller, and he will be as safe as he could possibly be over there. In the middle of base, in a tower, directing planes.
Here is a clip from the first episode of Coming Home's highlights. Grab a tissue. Or if you are like me, grab an entire box of tissues. Josh hasn't even left yet, and I'm already longing for his coming home. I might just tackle him when I see him for the first time after a year has passed.
Right after Grant was born we learned that my sister's unit is also being deployed. Thankfully she is not one of the ones going. And so far neither is Neil. I don't think I could handle both of them being gone!
Thank a soldier today. They sacrifice so much for our great country! That fact is becoming all too real to me.
(Picture from Josh's BCT graduation.)
Words could never express how proud I am of my siblings!
2 comments:
Right there with you Crystal. Remember "we" are not in control and God has a plan. Worry will not change anything - prayer will. Tell God how you feel and trust Him to take care of Josh. He love Josh even more than you do.
That is what keeps me sane. Love you! Connie
OMG...I am right there with you Crystal. I am sitting here crying reading this blog. I am dreading it more and more each day. It really will be a tough year - probably the toughest one our family has ever gone through. But like Connie said and I truly believe - God does have a plan and that He is going to surround Josh with His protecting love and that is what is going to get me through this. I can only pray that I am still sane when Josh gets back home.
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